Not Ready for Prime Time Crime - A Melodramatic Story about Attempted "wifeocide"_The Smel

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Not Ready for Prime Time Crime - A Melodramatic Story about Attempted "wifeocide"

The Smell of Hotdogs

The Mistakes We've Made

I Know What I Heard

Not Ready for Prime Time Crime - A Melodramatic Story about Attempted "wifeocide"

Not Ready for Prime-Time Crime A Melodramatic Story about Attempted “Wifeocide”My husband doesn’t mean to be a murderer.He doesn’t look like a murderer. I think he simply forgets to examine his plans for possible consequences.Nonetheless, my life has been in peril three times at the hands of my hubby.The first attempt on my life was made on my 50th birthday.We planned a party for my big 5-0. While getting ready for the party, we noticed we needed a few more lawn chairs out of the garage for our guests. So, my husband asked for my help in getting them down from the upper shelves. He placed me...cExone door

The Smell of Hotdogs

Darcy grips the steering wheel of his Porsche Boxster so tightly his knuckles are white under his clammy skin. He zooms south, down the 101 with nail-biting recklessness, oblivious to the downpour swamping the City of Angels. The rain is Biblical and as hard as nails, hammering the windscreen with a smashing velocity, the noise so thunderous Darcy cannot hear himself think. He licks his lips, savoring the taste of blood that lingers and decides the best course of action right now is to cry, "WHAT THE FUCK!"Screaming makes him feel human, and he even manages a laugh. Then, pressing the acceler...cExone door

The Mistakes We've Made

Content warning: Some swearingThe only problem with breaking into your neighbor's house is if someone else beats you to it.The Mastersons are gone for the month, summering in Fiji or Acapulco or wherever people go when they're filthy rich and can afford to flaunt it by using words like "summering." Before leaving, they'd asked me to watch their house. For free, of course. I smiled and told them they had nothing to worry about. www.onedoor.ccIt wasn't until their blue Bugatti sped down our dead-end street that I finally uncrossed the fingers hiding behind my back.Burglary 101: A good heist is all about patie...cExone door

I Know What I Heard

Gregg says you can’t hear anything in a hurricane.That is not true. I can hear anything. I’m like my mother. My mother could hear a mouse dancing on a snowflake in the middle of a symphony. The women in my family have tremendous ears. The men die young, but the women live forever and hear everything.Once, at a New Year’s Eve party, I heard someone disparaging my perm all the way from across the room. This big living room with a hundred people in it, and as everyone was counting down to midnight, all I could hear was Viv Olson saying I should have gone to her hairdresser, because mine had done ...cExone door