Tropospheric Tryst_All Hail the Metronome_Good Enough_Construction Project X
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Tropospheric Tryst
Content warning: mentions of sex***A pair of disembodied genitals were frantically copulating on the wing of the plane. In the cabin, my fellow passengers were in hysterics. Mothers were shielding their children’s eyes. Perverts were enjoying the aeronautical erotica; filming it with their phones. An incensed mother, sitting in front of me, buzzed the flight attendant. ‘How could you be so irresponsible?’ She asked. ‘You allowed at least two passengers without Securi-pants onboard. Check for anyone who is sleeping and wake them up!’The flight attendant dashed behind a blue curtain and rallied ...
All Hail the Metronome
Sometimes, teaching kids makes me want to put my head through a wall. I’m not talking math or science, either. That stuff is easy. Even the slowest kids will understand multiplication after a good tutoring session. I can teach almost anyone anything. I have a shortcut for almost every type of problem. Give me an hour with a D student, and he’ll start understanding how to multiply fractions or solve for x. 5th graders are annoying, bratty, and unusually idiotic. But they’re also pretty darn smart, and a good tutor can usually help them out. But when you put an instrument in their hands, they s...
Good Enough
My co-workers said a lot of bad things about me. And much of it was true. I was often late for staff meetings, impossible to reach before noon, and had a strong tendency to borrow savory snacks from the employee refrigerator that weren’t exactly mine. But the part about my being a nuisance of a personal assistant to Liz Suggs was completely false. In my four short weeks of employment at Reedsy, I had not only improved the flow of Liz’s workday, but I had managed to make countless ongoing suggestions to upgrade her sagging personal life as well. I’m not one to boast, but I was nothing s...
Construction Project X
“Hey boss, James, a member of the team of renovators says, walking towards him, “Is this place really up to bar with renovating, because I really don’t want to waste time to start when everything in that aparwww.onedoor.cctment looks like it’s falling apart.” Tray wondered if he had totally missed something when he spoke to the landlord about this apartment complex. “James!” He shouts when he realizes that he has completely messed up, hoping his boyfriend doesn’t kill him when he finds out and stopping James who was just walking into the apartment building, “Get everybody out, this place will be demolished ...